5 things you should Know About The Bible And Divorce

Bible And Divorce: 5 Things You Should Know

Divorce is a difficult and complex issue, and the Bible’s stance on divorce is no different. Some people believe that the Bible explicitly forbids divorce, while others believe that it allows for divorce in certain circumstances. Still, others believe that the Bible does not address divorce directly at all.

In this article, we will explore the Bible’s perspective on divorce and five things you should know about it. We will also discuss the importance of understanding the Bible’s perspective on divorce, even if you are not religious.

Why is it important to understand the Bible’s perspective on divorce?

• The Bible is the most widely read book in the world. It is estimated that over 5 billion copies of the Bible have been printed and distributed. This means that a large number of people are familiar with the Bible and its teachings, even if they do not identify as Christian. As such, the Bible’s perspective on divorce is likely to have an impact on people’s views on the subject, even if they do not agree with everything it says.

• The Bible is a source of moral and ethical guidance for many people. Even those who do not identify as religious often turn to the Bible for wisdom and guidance on how to live their lives. The Bible’s perspective on divorce can therefore provide people with a framework for thinking about their own marriages and relationships.

• The Bible offers guidance on how to navigate the challenges of divorce with compassion and grace. It teaches us how to forgive ourselves and others, how to heal from the pain of divorce, and how to rebuild our lives.
• The Bible reminds us that God loves us unconditionally, even when we make mistakes. This message of hope and love can be a lifeline for those who are struggling with the aftermath of divorce.

Now that we have seen the importance of Bible perspective on divorce, let’s consider the first thing you should know about the Bible and Divorce.

#1 Thing You Should Know About The Bible And Divorce – The Bible does not explicitly forbid divorce, but it does discourage it.

• Matthew 19:3-9 & Mark 10:2-12: The Pharisees question Jesus about divorce, and he emphasizes that in the beginning, God intended marriage to be an unbreakable union between a man and a woman. He points out that Moses allowed divorce due to the hardness of people’s hearts but clarifies that divorce should be permissible only in the case of fornication, and marrying someone else afterward constitutes adultery.

  Luke 16:18: This verse reiterates the teaching that whoever divorces and remarries commits adultery, and the same goes for anyone who marries a divorced person.

  1 Corinthians 7:10-16: Paul advises that in marriage, a husband should not divorce his wife, and a wife should not divorce her husband. If a believer is married to an unbeliever and the unbeliever is willing to stay, they should not be separated, as the unbelieving spouse is sanctified through the believing one. However, if the unbeliever chooses to leave, the believer is not bound to prevent it but is called to live in peace. The hope is for reconciliation and the salvation of the unbelieving spouse.

  Furthermore, we will move on to see the second thing you should know about the Bible and divorce.

#2 Thing You Should Know About The Bible And Divorce – The Bible recognizes that there are some circumstances in which divorce may be necessary.

• Adultery (Matthew 5:32): “But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.”
• Desertion (1 Corinthians 7:12-16): “But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. And the woman which hath a husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace. For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?”
• Abuse (1 Corinthians 7:15): “But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.”

I hope that you are learning something so far, let’s move on to the third thing you should know about the Bible and Divorce

#3 Thing You Should Know About The Bible And Divorce – The Bible encourages people to try to reconcile their marriages before getting a divorce.

• Matthew 18:15-20: In these verses, Jesus provides guidance on how to handle conflicts within the community of believers. The process begins with addressing a personal offense privately with the person who has wronged you. If reconciliation is achieved, the matter is resolved. If not, involve a few witnesses. If that still doesn’t lead to reconciliation, bring the issue before the church. Ultimately, the goal is reconciliation and restoration. Jesus emphasizes that where two or three are gathered in His name, He is present, emphasizing the importance of unity and reconciliation among believers.
• 1 Corinthians 7:10-16: These verses provide guidance on marriage and relationships between believers and non-believers. It begins with a command that married couples should not separate. If a separation does occur, it is advised that they either remain unmarried or seek reconciliation. If a believer is married to an unbeliever and the unbeliever is willing to live in peace with the believer, they should not separate. This unity within the marriage has a sanctifying effect. However, if the unbeliever chooses to leave, the believer is not bound to keep the marriage together. The primary concern is living in peace, and there is hope that the unbeliever may be influenced positively by the believer’s faith.

It is quite encouraging to know that the Bible encourages us to reconcile before getting a divorce. We go on to learn the fourth thing we should know.

#4 Thing You Should Know About The Bible And Divorce –  The Bible teaches that God forgives and welcomes back those who have gotten divorced.

• Luke 15:11-32 (The Parable of the Prodigal Son): This parable tells the story of a younger son who asks for his inheritance, squanders it in a distant land, and returns home in repentance. His father warmly welcomes him, which causes tension with his older brother who has been faithful. The parable illustrates God’s boundless love and forgiveness, emphasizing the joy in heaven when a sinner repents.
• John 8:1-11 (The Woman Caught in Adultery): This passage recounts the Pharisees bringing a woman caught in adultery to Jesus, testing Him. Jesus responds by challenging those without sin to cast the first stone. When they all depart, He tells the woman to go and sin no more. This episode illustrates Jesus’ compassion, forgiveness, and the importance of not passing judgment hastily.

God is indeed a God that forgives. Therefore let’s go on to know the fifth thing we should know about the Bible and Divorce.

#5 Thing You Should Know About The Bible And Divorce – The Bible offers hope and healing to those who have been divorced.

• Romans 8:28: “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”
• 2 Corinthians 5:17: “Therefore, if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.”
• Philippians 4:13: “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.”

In addition to learning about the five things we should know about the Bible and Divorce, let’s discover the communication styles that can lead to divorce if not properly attended to.

The Four Communication Styles That Lead To Divorce

The Book of Revelation in the New Testament describes the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse as metaphorical figures who bring pestilence, war, famine, and death. Inspired by this ominous vision, Dr. John Gottman used the same name to describe four communication styles that can predict divorce with 90% accuracy.

Over 20 years, Gottman studied more than 3,000 couples and was able to predict which couples would stay together and which would divorce within 6 years of marriage. He found that couples who use the following four communication styles are more likely to get divorced:

• Criticism: They blame their partner and make them feel bad.
• Contempt: They show their partner that they think they are inferior.
• Defensiveness: They refuse to take responsibility for their own mistakes or feelings.
• Stonewalling: They refuse to communicate or participate in the conversation.

If you are in a relationship and you see these communication styles happening, it is important to address them. By learning to communicate in a more healthy way, you can improve your chances of staying together.

However, you may have read what the Bible says about divorce and also learnt about the four communication styles that may likely lead to divorce but before you finally conclude about that divorce….

Before You Divorce: Read This

Marriage is not a fairytale and divorce is not always the best solution. Every marriage goes through hard times and yours is not an exception. Divorce is common but it can be prevented or avoided. As William Shatner rightly said, “Divorce is probably as painful as death.” It comes as no surprise that God hates divorce.

It does not matter where you are, what you have been through, or the current situation of your marriage, there is hope. When a person is considering divorce, they typically want to know if one really can prevent divorce. Yes, you can prevent the divorce. There is still time to save your marriage. I have written a book titled “Before You Divorce: Read This” This book will help you know what to do to prevent divorce. Let God, not culture or selfishness, have the final say in your marriage.

Frequently Asked Questions

What are the 4 biblical reasons for divorce?

What Jesus said about divorce?

That requires us to turn to the “exception clause” of Matthew 19:9: I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery. The Greek word Jesus used for “immorality” is the word from which we get our modern word pornography.

If you are struggling with divorce, here are some words of encouragement:

• Be kind to yourself. Divorce is a major life change, and it is normal to feel a range of emotions, including sadness, anger, and guilt. Allow yourself time to grieve the loss of your marriage and to adjust to your new life.
• Surround yourself with supportive people. Lean on your friends and family for love and support. They can be a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, and a source of practical help.
• Consider seeking professional help. A therapist can help you to process your emotions, cope with stress, and develop coping mechanisms.
• Don’t give up on yourself. Divorce is not the end of the world. It is possible to find love and happiness again.

Remember, you are not alone. Millions of people go through divorce each year. There are resources available to help you through this difficult time. You will get through this.

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